December 15th 2011

after going thru hell the past few months i have finally started to be able to relax again. my nerves are not so frazzled & i actually feel at peace with all the things that have happened. going thru this mess has made me realize what is important, what i actually need (not just want) & even though things are not wonderful yet, i know they can be again. i don't have to have what i would have called "a proper home with a formal living room, formal dining room", for the past month i have been living with just a living room, 2 bedrooms, a kitchen & pole room & it's not as bad as i thought it would be. now take into consideration that i DO have a bad ass screened in porch over looking the lake at this place so that sweetens the deal just a bit too, lol! since i have been out of my home & staying here i have fallen in love with living on the water! that not a good thing since i doubt i will be able to afford something like that for a while... especially since i don't want to work much O_o

i got a new pole about a week & a half ago, it's a painted, 45mm 8-9 foot static pole, it's somewhere in the teal/jade family, it's great! i do miss spinny mode a whole lot but i am so happy to have a pole! i also got some cool new exclusive shorts from bad kitty :) they are not even released yet, only cool kids have them like Alethea, Karol & a few others... & me :-D yeah i'm feeling like a bad ass because of it, hehe! also in pole news, i have finally mastered the allegra, super pain, & my over the shoulder split is kicking ass too! my yogini is solid as a rock && my inverts are now straight legged (like they should have been all along), now if i can nail the shoulder mount more that 3% of the time i will be doing great! i'm teaching pole classes one night a week but i want to teach more! now that i do not have a day job i have more time to teach, work on new moves & be more involved/active in the pole community :) i'm so hoping it works out so that i can just do pole related things for work & not have to have a 9-5 or any BS like that! i hate working for other people (except robin of course, lol).

it is going to be 70 degrees today, only 10 days before christmas so it's kinda strange but i'm not complaining at all!