great! my whole freakin' day went to shit in an instant!

well, well, well.... i had my meeting & it went the way i though it would, not the way i hoped it would :/ so things are not looking up one little bit! i thought my situation was kinda hopeless but i wasn't feeling hopeless until now. now i really have no clue what to do, where to turn or what to expect from my future. yes, things could be much worse but things are still bad enough to make me worry & now freedom is no where to be found. i'm pretty sure i will be ending my pole journey soon, not on my own, but against my will, which makes everything so much worse for me because pole is my passion & it is how i relieve stress... blah! this whole freakin' day went to shit in an instant!